Being in a successful and fulfilling marriage is a responsibility for both people in the relationship. In my own marriage, I have experienced challenging times. I am going to share with you how some fascinating tips saved my marriage.
How These Fascinating Tips Saved My Marriage
This is one essential aspect in a relationship that you expect to last for a life time. The reality about relationships is that the intensity of passion attenuates with time until it reaches a point where your marriage is no longer fun or rewarding. This could be caused by lifetime stress or the changes that one of you might be experiencing. Sometimes you can feel disconnected, which is fairly normal in long-term relationships.
If you decide to conduct research by interviewing people who have been married for 40 years, they will definitely tell you that things have never been that smooth. Actually, there is no other way you can make a marriage work other than making an overarching commitment to your marriage. You must be willing to go an extra mile to make sure that your marriage will work.
Tip Two. Emotional Maturity and Personal Growth
Make sure that each one of you in the relationship is willing to advance their abilities by providing and recognizing the other person’s needs. Each of the parties should be willing to develop a larger purpose in life to ensure growth.
Growth can entail small and big leaps, but what is essential here is to make sure that both of you are willing to focus in making their own personal life healthy and full filling. Being healthier in a relationship will ensure that you contribute more to your partnership.
Tip Three. Choose to move towards Not Away
This is an advice given by John Gottman in his research which was pivoted on what determines marital success. Moving closer to one another, especially after a disagreement or arguments will help you to repair the punctured relationship and help address your problems.
What I often observe in couple is that they move away from each other when they are upset. This will develop patterns of not telling each other their inner thoughts and feelings or begin to live separate lives while they feel disconnected. Moving towards each other simply entails greeting each other with a hug or a kiss after every day or laughing together after arguing. It also means that after detecting times that you are disconnected, you should do something to make sure that you are back on track. When you are in an argument with your partner, you should focus on repairing but not ganging against them.
Tip four. Be 100% accountable for your words, thoughts and actions about your marriage or spouse
Many people out there believe that marriage is 50/50. The reality is that 50/50 do not exist in marriage. Sometimes in a certain period of your marriage, you will be making more money and doing a lot of housework. If your partner is sick or wants to advance his or her education, you will be forced to attend to childcare as well as run errands. This is what
love and emotional maturity entails. Do not believe in the 50/50 myths, but rather be 100% responsible for your partner and not necessary for them. This actually means that you are taking responsibility of your marriage with the words you say to your spouse or about your marriage to others. Manage your negative thoughts, especially when you are angry. Make sure that you avoid being angry at each other and start to understand each other for the sake of your partnership. You should be fully responsible for your actions by being friend and faithful to one another.
Tip five. Recognize that you both have valid points of view that are just different
This is one essential aspect to ensure that relationships, succeed but most of us operate that we think and speak the truth about things. We always have the notion that our point of view of the world is more valid than what the others have in mind. Failing to acknowledge each other will lead to arguments. When partners fail to understand that their partner has an equally valid point of view they are referred to as having a “binocular vision.” Merging both your point of views depicts emotional maturity, this will ensure that you lead a smooth relationship rather than being hurt and feeling angry.
In conclusion, ensure that you put in practice what we have discussed because these fascinating tips saved my marriage.