Fascinating Tips that Saved My Marriage

Being in a successful and fulfilling marriage is a responsibility for both people in the relationship. In my own marriage, I have experienced challenging times. I am going to share with you how some fascinating tips saved my marriage.
How These Fascinating Tips Saved My Marriage

Tip one. Commitment

This is one essential aspect in a relationship that you expect to last for a life time. The reality about relationships is that the intensity of passion attenuates with time until it reaches a point where your marriage is no longer fun or rewarding. This could be caused by lifetime stress or the changes that one of you might be experiencing. Sometimes you can feel disconnected, which is fairly normal in long-term relationships.

If you decide to conduct research by interviewing people who have been married for 40 years, they will definitely tell you that things have never been that smooth. Actually, there is no other way you can make a marriage work other than making an overarching commitment to your marriage. You must be willing to go an extra mile to make sure that your marriage will work.

Tip Two. Emotional Maturity and Personal Growth

Make sure that each one of you in the relationship is willing to advance their abilities by providing and recognizing the other person’s needs. Each of the parties should be willing to develop a larger purpose in life to ensure growth.

Growth can entail small and big leaps, but what is essential here is to make sure that both of you are willing to focus in making their own personal life healthy and full filling. Being healthier in a relationship will ensure that you contribute more to your partnership.

Tip Three. Choose to move towards Not Away

This is an advice given by John Gottman in his research which was pivoted on what determines marital success. Moving closer to one another, especially after a disagreement or arguments will help you to repair the punctured relationship and help address your problems.

What I often observe in couple is that they move away from each other when they are upset. This will develop patterns of not telling each other their inner thoughts and feelings or begin to live separate lives while they feel disconnected. Moving towards each other simply entails greeting each other with a hug or a kiss after every day or laughing together after arguing. It also means that after detecting times that you are disconnected, you should do something to make sure that you are back on track. When you are in an argument with your partner, you should focus on repairing but not ganging against them.

Tip four. Be 100% accountable for your words, thoughts and actions about your marriage or spouse

Many people out there believe that marriage is 50/50. The reality is that 50/50 do not exist in marriage. Sometimes in a certain period of your marriage, you will be making more money and doing a lot of housework. If your partner is sick or wants to advance his or her education, you will be forced to attend to childcare as well as run errands. This is what

love and emotional maturity entails. Do not believe in the 50/50 myths, but rather be 100% responsible for your partner and not necessary for them. This actually means that you are taking responsibility of your marriage with the words you say to your spouse or about your marriage to others. Manage your negative thoughts, especially when you are angry. Make sure that you avoid being angry at each other and start to understand each other for the sake of your partnership. You should be fully responsible for your actions by being friend and faithful to one another.

Tip five. Recognize that you both have valid points of view that are just different

This is one essential aspect to ensure that relationships, succeed but most of us operate that we think and speak the truth about things. We always have the notion that our point of view of the world is more valid than what the others have in mind. Failing to acknowledge each other will lead to arguments. When partners fail to understand that their partner has an equally valid point of view they are referred to as having a “binocular vision.” Merging both your point of views depicts emotional maturity, this will ensure that you lead a smooth relationship rather than being hurt and feeling angry.

In conclusion, ensure that you put in practice what we have discussed because these fascinating tips saved my marriage.

8 Secrets to Keep Long Lasting Marriage

When people get married, they usually expect that the marriage will last forever. However, when the honeymoon period wears off and people become complacent, it is not uncommon for marriages to break down. These 8 secrets keep long lasting marriage a possibility.

1 – Pay the Love Bank

The first of the 8 secrets keep long lasting marriage is the idea of the love bank. The love bank is a “mental bank” that both you and your spouse have. Every time you do something good for your spouse, it nourishes your relationship with them. Every time they do something good back, it nourishes their relationship with you. If you start focusing your attention outside of the marriage, you deplete that love bank, which is not a good thing. Make a point to put your spouse’s needs and wishes at the top of your list to keep the relationship happy.

2 – Talk Every Day

This is perhaps the most important of the 8 secrets keep long lasting marriage – you should always take a moment to talk to your spouse every day. Ask them how their day was, and talk to them about their plans for the future, what they’re excited about, what they’re bored about, etc. This will keep you close together, and in touch with each other even if you are stressed and busy.

3 – Take Care of Your Health

Do not let yourself go. If you love your spouse you should make an effort to stay in good shape. Eat healthily and get plenty of exercise. Try not to gain too much weight, or to fall into a habit of smoking or drinking. If you stay fit and healthy you will have more energy to do fun things with your spouse into old age.old-450742_1280

4 – Accept That People Change

The person you married is not going to exist in statis. They will want to take up new hobbies, meet new people and try new things. They might cut their hair, or discover a love for a new sport. They might want to pursue a new carer. Encourage and support them in this, because if they are a good spouse they will do the same thing for you.

5 – Put Your Spouse First

Sometimes people from outside of your relationship will put pressure on you to do things. Perhaps your family will want something from you, or your friends or your boss will make demands on your time. When you get married, you are saying that you have your spouse’s priorities in mind above all else. Back them up – be their rock and the person that they can depend on. Don’t let outside influences harm your relationship.

6 – Say Thank You

You might think that your spouse knows that you love them and that you appreciate everything that they do, but you cannot be certain that this is the case. Instead of just assuming, come out and say it. Don’t just say “I love you” as a thoughtless thing. Rather, say “I really appreciate the way you do X for me every day” or “Thank you for supporting me when I had that overtime” – recognize the things that they do, so that they know that they are being noticed.

7 – Understand Each Other Before You Marry

Before you get married, discuss boundaries an reach agreements about how your relationship will work. Some couples have agreements about things like opposite gender friends, relationships with in-laws or how personal finances will be handled. Work out those things before the wedding, so that you understand where your partner is coming from and how the relationship will work.

8 – Be Willing to Say No

Sometimes, your partner may want to do something that makes you uncomfortable. Learn when to say no and when to try to compromise. Get used to explaining how you feel in a non-confrontational way, and accept that sometimes your partner may want you to change something too. A successful marriage involves a lot of communication and effort from both parties. The more you invest in understanding your spouse and reassuring them that you care about them, the better the relationship will be.

10 Required Steps to Married Couples for a Healthy Relationship

This article has garnered 10 best steps married couple is required to adhere to ensure that their marriage works. Many researchers have conducted studies to help married couples have a successful marriage. According to Terri Orbuch Ph.D, who is a psychologist, it does take hard work to keep a relationship happy or stable over time.

The following are top 10 best steps married couple is required to follow for a healthy relationship.wedding-322034_1280

1. Expect Less and Get More for Your Partner

Many couples assume conflict as a recipe of marriage. The truth is constant conflicts is caused by frustration. Frustration occurs when a partner’s expectations are not met. Happy couples have realistic expectations concerning their relationship in general and about their relationship in particular.

For practicality, have you and your partner scribble separately your top two expectations for your relationship. This will enable you to understand what is important for your partner. It also enables your partner to fulfill your expectations because they already know them.

2. Give Incentives and Rewards

Affective affirmation plays a major role in a relationship. It lets your partner know that they are special and valued; they should not be taken for granted. Affective affirmation can be in form of words like “I love you”, “you are my best friend” among other things.

Affirmative behavior ranges from turning on the coffee pot in the morning to sending sexy emails among practical things. Avoid the notion that men require more affective affirmation than women because women can get it from other people in life. Make sure that you make an affirmation each day because it will keep your partner happy during the day.

3. Conduct Daily Briefing for improved Communication
Most couples think that they communicate. But they fail to understand that these communications they have is what is called “maintaining the household”. These talks are essentially about paying bills, buying groceries, helping the kids with homework or calling the in-laws.

Make sure that you maintain a clear and meaningful communication especially getting to know your partners inner world. Understand what makes your partner happy. To fully understand each other, you are required to talk everyday about your experiences. Spend at least ten minutes to talk with your partner about something else apart from things concerning the house.

4. Implement Change

Make sure that you implement change in your relationship to avoid monotony. Add something new to your normal schedule, this will ensure that you still explore new limits in your relationship thus mimicking the day you first met. Reduce boredom and keep things fresh by changing your routine.

5. Keep Costs Low and Benefits High

Apart from adding incentives to your relationship, keeping the costs low is important. According to research conducted it has been concluded that a happy couple has 5 to 1 ratio: keeping the five positive feelings and experiencing to one negative experience of feeling.

Having a well calculated approach to your relationship is good. Perform audits on your relationship regularly while taking into consideration the costs and benefits. Many couples fail the moment they consider a balance in the pros and cons- this should be avoided entirely.

6. Curdles Four Times a Day

This is a prescription like any other. Having full body hugs always help to stimulate hormone endorphin that helps you bond with one another. It also helps you and your partner to explore your personal space. This will help to strengthen the feeling of connection and intimacy.

7. Have Date once a Fortnight

Regular dates play a crucial role by enabling the partners to bond. According to conducted research, injecting novelty into a relationship boosts the level of serotonin. This is the chemical that floods the brain and enables you to fall in love.

8. Having Separate Nights Out

This will ensure that you maintain your identity in the relationship. It enables you to obtain your own support system other than your partner. It establishes topics that you will discuss with each other.

9. Cleaning the House Three Time a Month

Probably you are asking yourself what for? This is a gesture that shows that you have respect for each other. Showing your partner that you want to live in a clean place together- means that you value health and happiness of your relationship.

10. Romantic gestures
This benefits both of you by building confidence in the relationship. Romantic gestures nurtures a tradition of being grateful. The partner receiving them feels good because their partner has considered them.

Generally, if you adhere to the 10 Best Steps Married Couple ideas discussed above, you will lead a happy and rewarding relationship lasting a lifetime.